Category: Rock, Paper, Shotgun

I have recently immersed myself in the pleasantly numb Monster Hunter Wilds loop of smashing Arkvelds to bits. They are, as far as I can tell, the most profitable creature to bully, and I now find myself skinny dipping in the gulf of meaning that lies between the regal, resentful, mildly sassy chains hanging from the creature’s armour set, and the deeply sad and laboured motions with which it swings its bodily inspiration for those chains.

I get the sense that the series’ solution to the uncomfortable implications of its lizard bashing has been, over the last few entries, to evil-fy its creature design to the point where it engenders less easy empathy. There’s a lot of ugly, bugly bastards in Wilds, is what I’m saying. Less deep, sad lizard eyes and more chittering chitin and fuck-you dragon stares. The Arkveld’s design is so threatening that it invites nothing if not: look mate, if four of us manage to take you down with scissors whittled from Original Recipe Chatacabra marrow, it’s your own fault here, ya bish.

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In Remedy’s Control spin-off FBC: Firebreak, trios of gadget-toting humans from the Federal Bureau of Control descend to the shapeshifting halls of the Oldest House, fighting eldritch Hiss invaders and possessed objects such as swarming Post-It notes. Where Control cast you as the FBC’s newly appointed director, equipped with executive perks such as telekinesis, the folks who make up the Firebreak initiative are regular office shmucks brandishing comparatively straightforward guns and bludgeoning implements. They’re here years after Control’s denouement to do some clean-up, with the Oldest House still under lockdown while the FBC seek a proper, lasting solution to the Hiss menace.

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Mount & Blade 2: Bannerlord, is coming up to three years now, but at the Future Games Show this evening, all these years on, developer TaleWorlds Entertainment announced that the strategy action game will be getting its first bit of DLC, War Sails. If you can’t gather from the name, featured image above, and trailer below, the DLC is all about boats; sailing ’em, fighting with ’em, trading with ’em, you name it, these boats can do it (within reason).

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Frosthaven – the sequel to Cephalofair’s knock-a-horse-out massive board game – is getting a digital version from Julian Gollop’s Snapshot Games. You can sign up here to its closed beta kicking off March 27th, and it’s coming to Steam early access later this year.

Like predecessor Gloomhaven, Frosthaven is a tactical RPG where you’ll resolve story events and encounters between dungeon delving, retiring old characters and unlocking new classes as you progress. New to Frosthaven is a fleshed-out management game that has you build up and protect an outpost, while dealing with harsh seasons and invaders.

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InZOI kind of looks like an exercise in pushing the uncanny valley to me, something I’d wholeheartedly respect if that were definitely the intention behind the game, but I have a hunch that it really is just meant to be The Sims, but if it looked like real life. Whether that’s enough to win over Sims lovers or not, I’m not sure, its early access release isn’t until next week so we’ll all know more then. However! You do now have the opportunity to try and test the limits of its character creator, as like a few games have done in recent years, its Create a Zoi feature is available to download as its own thing… if you’re happy to do a bit of homework.

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I have nothing but respect for a Steam update that promises gameplay details then quickly melts into an impressionistic tone poem about fighting the moon. Really though, what else does Skate Story need to say? We’ve already known how lovely it looks since not-E3 of 2022, then we found out even more about it from a demo last year. Do you want to miss out on the action of a game that made Brendy use words like “abstract rhythmodivinity” and Graham use words like “popeye’s elbow”. Of course you don’t. Here’s the new trailer.

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I want a good gaming monitor for cheap, and this KTC 27-inch QHD gaming monitor is ticking all the right boxes. Amazon just dropped the price to $92.99 when you stack a $40 coupon with the promo code “05DMKTC38”, making this one of the best budget gaming monitor deals I’ve seen in a long time.

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“…and of course Hollow Knight: Silksong too!”

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Remember how it felt in Bloodborne when you discovered a shield and learned that it existed purely to shame and humiliate returning Dark Souls players who are over-reliant on blocking? Do you remember reading those awful, judging, fourth-wall-besmirching words, “Shields are nice, but not if they engender passivity”? Well, The Knightling is the opposite of that feeling. It’s a bouncy, breezy open world platformer in which you are a novice chevalier equipped with a circular, gear-toothed shield he uses for absolutely everything.

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It’s been a billion years since I played a proper new Front Mission game, and I’m depressed to learn that Square Enix cancelled one in 2022. Titled Front Mission 2089: Borderscape and developed by BlackJack Studio, it was announced for release on iOS and Android but, who knows, might have clanked and rumbled onto PC, the place all good mobile games go when they die. Alas, Square Enix shut the project down a few months after reveal. Now, they’re suing BlackJack for releasing a new game that allegedly makes use of leftover parts from the Front Mission contract.

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